Notes · ~3 min read
Most deals aren't about the product
I've watched a lot of deals die on a perfectly good product. And I've watched a lot of worse products win. After enough of those, you stop believing the deal is about the thing you're selling.
Here's what I think it's actually about.
The buyer is having two conversations
There's the one out loud — specs, price, timeline. And there's the one underneath — can I trust this person, will this make me look good or foolish, am I being handled right now. The second conversation is the one that closes or kills the deal. Most reps only sell into the first one.
The tell is usually small. A buyer who's leaning in and suddenly sits back. A "makes sense" that comes half a beat too fast. A question about price that's really a question about risk. If you're only listening to the words, you miss all of it. If you're reading the room, that's where the deal is actually happening.
Stop overcoming objections. Start finding the real one.
"Overcoming objections" is a phrase I've come to dislike, because it treats the buyer like a wall to get through. Most stated objections aren't the real objection. "It's too expensive" is often "I don't yet believe this will work." "I need to think about it" is often "I'm afraid of what happens if I'm wrong."
You don't overcome those with a better feature sheet. You find them by making it safe for the person to tell you the truth — and then you meet the truth honestly. Nine times out of ten, the moment a buyer feels genuinely understood is the moment the deal moves. Not because you convinced them. Because you stopped making them defend themselves.
Match, don't push
The reps who close the most aren't the most aggressive. They're the ones who find the real need and the real fit and make both sides see it clearly. That's not softness — it's precision. When the match is real, you don't have to push; you just have to point at it together. And the buyer leaves feeling like they won something, which is exactly the feeling that makes them buy again and send you the next three.
What this means for your team
If your close rate is soft, I'd look past the pitch and the pricing first. I'd listen for the second conversation — the one underneath — and ask whether your reps can hear it. That's a skill you can coach, and it's the highest-leverage thing I know to coach.
It's also, honestly, the thing I love most about this work: the moment someone feels seen, and the whole conversation changes.